i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.
Oooh, he sounds pretty classy
Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize
