I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
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