so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
Randomize
