Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
People in love make me want to vomit
Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
I don't get promposals. When I asked my date I was so drunk I couldn't lift my head. Then I puked on my lawn after he said "ok whatever". That's romance
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
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