My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
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