I accidentally had phone sex last night
your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
Randomize
