awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
Dating a girl 4 years younger than you is like living in a Taylor Swift song...
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
A 3am FaceTime to go to IHOP is the closest thing to a bootycall that I'm getting
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
Randomize
