Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
Randomize
