Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
19 Of The Creepiest (Most Inexplicable) Things People Experienced
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.