That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
im like that movie w. ryan reynolds, no ones ever going to date me unless they're forced to marry me.
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
Randomize
