But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
The woman at walgreens tried to sell me clearance condoms with my fake eyelashes. Does it look like I get laid?
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
Randomize
