So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
Randomize