I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
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