come pick me up. please. i just puked in my lap. bring pants.
Welp...herpes.
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
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he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
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Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
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