Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom is making me buy a single zucchini, I look like someone who can't afford a dildo
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
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