I just saw a hot homeless man
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
