So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
I wish i was in the wii world.
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
She's like the Michael Jordan of alcoholism
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation