i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
I have left a significant number of teethmarks in my prhone. My mouth tastes like tequila and cheddar. Tomorrow already feels fun.
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
Randomize