i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
Hey I know you're not home, but I'm here. Your front door is unlocked and someone took shit on your doormat...
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
Randomize
