THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
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