I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
Yea i'm supposed to have jury duty on monday. Hope they don't mind me still being drunk.
Na you can't get charged for public intoxication unless you're outside. I checked.
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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