Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
You're a waste of cheezeits
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
we're so committed to being not committed
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