So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
OK, the bar's closing. Do I go to home to my wife or my girlfriend?
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
Randomize
