JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
You didn't have enough money so you tried to convince the cashier that "four dollar foot long" rolled off the tongue better. Stop drinking. Immediately.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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