Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
Hungover at Subway, watching a business guy try to squeeze his way past my car to get into his. Bitch shouldn'ta parked over the line.
You truly are a temple of morality.
I am the night, I am justice, I am currently watching the fat biz guy pay a frat boy to back his car up for him so he can get in.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
