just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
Randomize
