WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
Randomize
