i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.