that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
Just rolled over and realized my vodka goggles are not as functional as my beer goggles
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
Randomize
