Texts From Last Night

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  (315): View more from New York

  covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly

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  (315): covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly http://tfl.nu/6dbu
  Replies (5) Good night (2398) Bad night (1217)
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  (812): View more from Indiana

  So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions

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  (812): So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions http://tfl.nu/7b2z
  Replies (14) Good night (2665) Bad night (797)
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  (443): View more from Maryland

  I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.

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  (443): I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding. http://tfl.nu/l068
  Replies (25) Good night (1569) Bad night (6831)
• Favorite

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.

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  (617): i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good. http://tfl.nu/gykq
  Replies (116) Good night (6469) Bad night (1394)
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  (734): View more from Michigan

  going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.

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  (734): going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season. http://tfl.nu/7bt6
  Replies (12) Good night (3400) Bad night (830)
• Favorite

  (402): View more from Nebraska

  she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics

  (1-402): View more from Nebraska

  you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.

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  (402): she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics (1-402): you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys. http://tfl.nu/veft
  Replies (18) Good night (8721) Bad night (1336)
• Favorite

  (732): View more from New Jersey

  Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.

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  (732): Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day. http://tfl.nu/xpns
  Replies (29) Good night (6427) Bad night (2743)
• Favorite

  (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.

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  (403): Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms. http://tfl.nu/yg77
  Replies (2) Good night (2285) Bad night (1087)
• Favorite

  (707): View more from California

  I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA

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  (707): I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA http://tfl.nu/ppt3
  Replies (24) Good night (3178) Bad night (1467)
• Favorite

  (801): View more from Utah

  He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.

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  (801): He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life. http://tfl.nu/2uzh
  Replies (7) Good night (511) Bad night (1375)
• Favorite

  (512): View more from Texas

  I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though

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  (512): I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though http://tfl.nu/zufj
  Replies (2) Good night (1229) Bad night (443)
• Favorite

  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!

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  (608): Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know! http://tfl.nu/hgdr
  Replies (2) Good night (350) Bad night (822)
• Favorite

  (386): View more from Florida

  Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.

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  (386): Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost. http://tfl.nu/901r
  Replies (2) Good night (593) Bad night (287)
• Favorite

  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?

  (262): View more from Wisconsin

  I can't wait to tell mom.

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  (920): He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me? (262): I can't wait to tell mom. http://tfl.nu/c20r
  Replies (2) Good night (489) Bad night (627)
• Favorite

  (575): View more from New Mexico

  I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.

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  (575): I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone. http://tfl.nu/i4rk
  Replies (3) Good night (301) Bad night (441)

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