Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
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just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
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Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
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