Texts From Last Night

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  (443): View more from Maryland

  Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.

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  (443): Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry. http://tfl.nu/7406
  Replies (19) Good night (923) Bad night (3277)
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  (325): View more from Texas

  That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.

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  (325): That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions. http://tfl.nu/l7t6
  Replies (21) Good night (3236) Bad night (1311)
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  (240): View more from Maryland

  Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.

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  (240): Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea. http://tfl.nu/4ze6
  Replies (41) Good night (5474) Bad night (3646)
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  (317): View more from Indiana

  I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.

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  (317): I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment. http://tfl.nu/sxji
  Replies (13) Good night (5279) Bad night (1012)
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  (937): View more from Ohio

  He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?

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  (937): He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst? http://tfl.nu/5xe1
  Replies (67) Good night (1890) Bad night (26258)
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  (901): View more from Tennessee

  Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?

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  (901): Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out? http://tfl.nu/cfeo
  Replies (29) Good night (6173) Bad night (1305)
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  (917): View more from New York City

  And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.

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  (917): And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating. http://tfl.nu/qged
  Replies (19) Good night (5844) Bad night (1779)
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  (626): View more from California

  Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?

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  (626): Did they have a limo or was i just stoned? http://tfl.nu/ui6f
  Replies (4) Good night (2157) Bad night (1086)
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  (210): View more from Texas

  Road construction signs are deceptively heavy

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  (210): Road construction signs are deceptively heavy http://tfl.nu/a969
  Replies (5) Good night (2590) Bad night (707)
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  (916): View more from California

  If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.

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  (916): If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it. http://tfl.nu/e2co
  Replies (5) Good night (804) Bad night (1126)
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  (845): View more from New York

  Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins

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  (845): Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins http://tfl.nu/if6l
  Replies (6) Good night (1474) Bad night (644)
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  (310): View more from California

  I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.

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  (310): I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest. http://tfl.nu/r5b0
  Replies (1) Good night (394) Bad night (700)
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  (269): View more from Michigan

  He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.

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  (269): He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle. http://tfl.nu/cm4y
  Replies (7) Good night (970) Bad night (383)
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  (516): View more from New York

  like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked

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  (516): like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked http://tfl.nu/u8p9
  Replies (2) Good night (717) Bad night (262)
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  (289): View more from Ontario

  Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?

  (1-289): View more from Ontario

  When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.

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  (289): Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this? (1-289): When she went in the beer store I got to hold it. http://tfl.nu/fggc
  Replies (2) Good night (741) Bad night (174)

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