The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
Randomize
