The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
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