you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
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