Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
Dude, I just cut my asshole on the new toilet paper. If you rationed the grocery money to buy drugs, I better be getting some.
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
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