How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
He was all like, "I think ur the one that got away and I miss you." I replied, "I gave u a hand job once in your hot tub. No need to wax nostalgic about it."
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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