I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
Leaving someone plastered on a corner at 3am telling them to just scream for cock is NOT being a good wingman.
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
Randomize
