you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Randomize
