dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
And the cops told us we were all naked.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
Randomize
