I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
Randomize
