Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
3pm strippers are depressing
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
YOU HAVE PISSED AND FUCKED ON LITERALLY EVERYTHING IN MY HOUSE
Not everything, just a few things. And only a few times. The odds are really not all that bad when you break it down.
you’ve pissed every time you slept over. there’s no such thing as odds anymore. it’s guaranteed
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
