I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
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