I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
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