Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
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