Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
I woke up this morning with my shirt on upside down.
You mean inside out.
No, upside down. I ripped the neck hole in the process of getting it around my waist.
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
I have to drop off my inflatable penis costume at the bar for my bartender. Do you think you could meet me there at like 630?
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
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