You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
