So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
Hey, I can't get ahold of Tommy. Let him know his ex-girlfriend is pregnant.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
You snapped me at 3am drunk laying on your floor asking if I knew how we couldn't have predicted the housing crisis.
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Randomize