Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
That awkward moment when you can't tell what smells like tacos: you, the cat, or the strange guys blanket your so tenderly swaddled in.
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
In other news, I just burned my penis
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
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