i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
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