My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
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