i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
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